"I wanna cast Detect pink bunnies"
"You're a fighter"
"So?"
"Ok you cast detect pink bunnies, and a pink bunnie apears and bites you on the butt. You take (roll) three points of damamge"

"How does the zombie look?"
"Dead."
"I mean damage wise."
"The zombie is fatally wounded."
"Is it still moving?"
"Yep, it's a zombie."
"Oh."

Player 1: "What happened to the dwarf?"
GM (me): "He's in the river..."
Player 1: "I don't see him in the river."
GM: "Because he's *in* the river"
Player 1: "He doesn't swim very well, how can that be?"
Player 2: "Exactly...I'm *in* the river."
Player 1: "You're wearing your armor, that's a pretty bad idea...why'd your character jump in the river?"
Player 2: "I didn't jump, I fell...care to help out with this, or what?"
Player 1: "Why'd you fall in the river with your armor on...you can barely swim at the best of times!"
In unison
GM: "EXACTLY..."
Player 2: "EXACTLY..."
Player 1: "Guess I should get a rope or something...do I see any rope?"
GM: "There's plenty of rope on the deck of the barge. Ropes and chains and long poles."
Player 1: "Poles? I'm not checking for traps, I'm saving a drowning dwarf. I attach the chain to the railing and look around for a hook"
GM: "How fast are you doing this?"
Player 2: "Grrrr"
Player 1: "Oh, not that fast...I want to make sure it's secure."
Some time and a few dice rolls later, and a very water logged and dead dwarf is pulled out of the river...and the player of the dwarf is in the kitchen cussing about the event.
Player 1: "What do you mean he's drowned?!? He was only in the water for ten minutes or so!"

Player 1: "I stick the immovable rod down his throat, click the switch, and push him off the airship"
GM: "You are yanked off the airship along with him, and find yourself dangleing high above the city as the airship speeds along it's course away from you."
Player 1: "What the hell?!?"
GM: "You don't remember tieing him to your wrist before you boarded the ship to stop him from running away?"
Player 1: "Aww crap..."
GM: "Well, then I suppose you don't remember tieing your other wrist to the rail so he couldn't throw you overboard."
Player 1: "AWWW CRAP!"
Player 2: "I see this happeneing, so I grab the rope and try to reel him in."
GM: "The center point of all of this is an *immovable* rod guys."
Pretty much in unison:
Player 2: "F**k it, I cut the rope so he doesn't get ripped in half."
Player 1: "F**k it, I cut the rope tieing me to the guy."

"On the table you find random tourture emplememnts, two silver daggers and a bunch of dried herbs."
"I have that skill.... I roll a 18"
"It's wolfsbane"
"Well that can't be good"

Scenario: A D&D 3.5 adventure in Baldur's Gate.

GM: Okay, you draw a card from The Deck of Too Many Things. Roll.
Player 1: What do I get?
GM: You are cursed. The next time you fall asleep, a major earthquake will happen.
Player 1: Okay, I can handle that.
Player 2: Yeah, we will camp somewhere in the forest tonight.

3 hours later (session time)...
GM: You are jumping from rooftop to rooftop. You will make it outside city walls at the end of the roof you are currently on.
Player 1: I bolt and jump over the city wall.
GM: Suddenly, you are cut off by three people who appear with a blinding flash.
Player 1: I run.
GM: They take their attacks of opportunity.
[Several rolls later]
GM: You take enough damage that you fall unconscious.
Player 1: That sucks.
GM: You're not dead. Just unconscious. What do you guys do?
Player 2: Wait, he's unconscious?
Player 3: Uh oh!
GM: What?
Player 3: He is technically asleep.
GM: No...
Player 2: Yes. What else are you when asleep?
GM: (flipping through book for a couple of minutes) Well...um...a major earthquake happens. And it destroys half of Baldur's Gate.
Player 1: Do I survive?
Player 2: Dude, that's the least of our problems.
Player 3: Crap.